Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Turkey Anxiety Disorder (T.A.D.)

Oh, help me Rhonda!

Today is T.P. Day (Turkey Preparation Day). My palms are so sweaty that I could brine the turkey with them.

In order to process my feelings on this dreaded day, I have written a poem. I have titled it "Turkey Lurky". Here goes...sorry in advance...

Turkey Lurky, Turkey Lurky
Where for art thou, Turkey Lurky?

In the fridge you wait for me
To come and place you gently
In a brothy, frothy brine
Seasoned well with salt and wine.

A turkey by any other name would smell as sweet
I'm so sorry that they cut off your feet
And stuffed you in a plastic bag
I feel the need to stop and gag.

Composure gained, I must go on
This poem is getting way too long
All the world's a stage, and the time is nigh
I think that I'm about to cry.

Turkey Lurky, Turkey Lurky,
Where for art thou, Turkey Lurky?

Out, out darn spot I start to say
Giblets make me swoon and sway
The time has come, the time is near
When I will scream, "Pete!!!! Please stick your hand up this turkey's rear!"

Turkey Lurky, Turkey Lurky
Where for art thou, Turkey Lurky?

Hugs,

Melissa



P.S. I am so thankful for those of you who bravely endure this blog and I want to thank you. Please see yesterday's post for a chance to score a gift card from Amazon.



1 comment: